Stressed
Worried
Apprehensive
Irritated
Insecure
These are all heavy emotional states that can occur when you are struggling to make a decision about something. They leave you feeling like you can’t see the wood for all the trees. Unchecked they can multiply and snowball into a sub-optimal survival state for decision making. It makes you become guarded, less aware of your feelings and instincts and more likely to make decisions that aren’t aligned with your true goals and values.
Repeated decision making in these stressed states can snowball to a state of burnout where you feel like everything you are doing is below par, like all choices you make could be better.
“Why did I say that mean thing to my partner/boss/child?”
“Did I really need that extra glass of wine/chocolate bar/handful of crisps?”
“I didn’t really mean to say yes to X, Y, Z commitment…”
“I could have gone to the class/gym really…”
It leads to feelings of shame, guilt, embarrassment and ultimately helplessness as nothing turns out quite how you want it to. You end up not meeting any of the tiny targets or goals that you set yourself daily or worse damaging relationships with people you care about. Do this every day in small doses and it adds up to a life totally off track compared to where you want it to be, unhappiness and a lack of will to change anything. Why bother, when it always goes wrong anyway?
Making any decision in these states is not ideal, from whether you should go to the gym, eat that last creme egg to the big ones like should you quit your job or leave your partner. Sure, sometimes there are emotional triggers that provide the last straw for decisions like these. But do you want these states to become how you make the bulk of your choices?
Think back over the last week, to all the times you were in a state of stress or tension of any kind.
Did you have choices at these points?
If you made the easy/rash/fired up one, did they lead you to the dream place or ideal state of mind for you?
Or onwards to more strife and stress?
Imagine what your world would look like if you made more of your decisions in a calmer, more thoughtful and loving state…
Would you like to be able to make more calm, considered decisions at the moment? To stop yourself mid-rant/stress/ frustration, step back and assess the situation.
Your self-awareness and awareness of others can both be improved when you work on your emotional intelligence. This helps to create more grounded decision-making processes that are more likely to support you in creating the situations and relationships that you truly desire.
Interested to find out more?
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